The Struggle to Connect

For some time I have been trying to decide how my online presences relate to each other if at all.  This website–prayer bedes–began as an extension of my Etsy shop where I sell Christian prayer beads.  (I know, the shop is currently empty.  That does not mean that I do not have pieces I have made that need to be priced and listed.  There is a box of those sitting right in front of me staring me in the face as I write this.)

Besides prayer beads, I have had other experiences come up in my prayer journey that I felt were worth sharing.  That led to starting a blog and Facebook page called Praying with our Senses.  Much of what I think about including there gets stopped in process as I wonder if the best place to write about it might be on my prayer bedes blog.  Sure, prayer beads area a way we can pray with our senses, but there are other ways too.

Another endeavor I have in the works is a website and Etsy shop called Center Rings.  This also relates to my prayer journey.  Right now it is set up to be a separate Etsy shop (currently empty) and separate website.

Yet another endeavor I am pursuing is BootleggersLTD.  Bootleggers are handmade boot anklets made from jacquard ribbon, ethnic textiles, and ethnic needlework.  I am not sure if they really have a spiritual significance.  They are meant to be just for fun and a way to introduce people to the beauty of ethnic textiles.

I am not done yet.  Another blog and Facebook page I started is Wee Winged Ones.  If you have not already figured out, I am most definitely an “idea” person.  Wee Winged Ones is where I have posted some projects and experiments.

For right now, I will leave it at that, but confess that there are others.  (If you read my Wee Winged Ones introduction in the upper part of the above image, you will see that I very often struggle with discerning what is “worthy” and the wisdom to know the difference.)

As I am working on this 40 bags in 40 days practice for Lent, I realize that spiritual practices can be found many places and too often we try to compartmentalize the spiritual aside from our tasks of daily living .  For instance, yesterday I cleaned out our our pantry.  After I posted a photo of the before and after to the Facebook group I joined with others who are working on the 40 bags in 40 days, I noticed someone posted that Sundays in Lent are considered “little Easters” and not included in the 40 days of Lent.  My reaction was “I knew that!”  But, somehow I did not apply that knowledge to the 40 day decluttering practice.

With those thoughts, I think I have decided that I am going to somehow combine some of these “projects” into this website.  In order to make them more searchable, I will include the “area” they are coming from and have a special tag for each. (I think.  That has been one of my dilemmas–how to do this.)

For those coming to this website specifically for prayer beads information, you will be able to click on the PrayerBeads tag to exclude the other stuff.  I know this will take awhile to get the tags changed, but I hope you will be patient with me.

God Bless your Lenten Journey!

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Not Afraid to Look

Watching the footage from some of the photographers at the Standing Rock camps, I would see this sculpture sometimes and wonder about it.  Who made it?  How did it get there?  How big is it?  What is it made out of?

I did a little research to find out some of these answers.  The sculpture is titled Not Afraid to Look the White Man in the Face.  The artist who created the sculpture is Charles Recountre  He is of Lakota heritage but now lives in New Mexico, where he made a similar piece that resides in Santa Fe.

The sculpture at Standing Rock, which sits on the edge of the hill overlooking Lake Oahe and the Cannon Ball River on the now evicted Sacred Stones camp, was completed in October 2016.  News resources say that Recountre with the help of people at camp worked from sun up to sun down for 30 days to complete the piece.  It was constructed from rebar and cement then painted a rich adobe red.

As I searched for photos of the sculpture, I started thinking about the significance of the title and how it related to me as a white woman.  Thoughts that ran through my head were:

• If I looked at myself as a white woman in the mirror, what would I see?

• If I considered myself part of the collective “we” as a white immigrant who came and took the land from these people, how do I respond?

• In relation to my last post about not turning away from sin, how does not being afraid to look echo those same thoughts?

One of the photos I found (the top one with the closeup view of the sculpture from behind) had me envisioning myself as the sculpture with someone behind me taking the photo.  Maybe that someone also had their hands on my shoulder in reassurance.  Maybe that someone is God giving me the courage to not just look but see.

If I sit here for a time in silence pondering those thoughts, how does it change the way I think, feel, see?

Last spring a little corner of our dining room evolved into a sort of prayer corner for me.  Yesterday I printed out that photo of Not Afraid to Look and added it to the corner.  I feel like it has more to tell me.





Credit for above photos:

Interview with the Artist:

Not Afraid to Look Sculpture in Santa Fe, New Mexico:

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Ash Wednesday – Don’t Turn Away

I have been doing some thinking about what is said to us in our church when we receive ashes on Ash Wednesday.  The person marking our heads says, “Turn away from sin and be faithful to the Gospel.”

Sin was once described to me as that which keeps us from God.  In other words, sin is separation from God.

It is those words “turn away” that have me thinking.  Do I really want to turn away from sin?  Could that also mean ignoring or not acknowledging my sins?  What if we said instead something like “Show us our sins and draw us closer to You”?

There was a post going around on Facebook on Tuesday about a Lenten de-cluttering challenge that really resonated with me.  The graphic originated from the website White House Black Shutters.

Are you following where I am going with this?

It was a tradition for many years in the Catholic church to give up something for Lent.  That has changed a bit over the years as it was proposed that instead of giving up something we might do something good instead.  Maybe the idea of giving up something was actually intended to give up something that keeps us from God, but that intention was a bit lost.  Giving up coffee, for instance, is in most cases not something that keeps us from God.

Still, maybe if we looked at giving something up in another way such as decluttering, the meaning of giving something up might be redefined and meaningful.  Decluttering can surely be a physical act, but it could also me a mental act if we consider clutter as things that get in the way of or obstruct our relationship with God.  You could maybe also call that clutter “road blocks”

Inspired by the 40 Bags for 40 Days of Lent challenge, I am going to commit to getting rid of at least one thing in my house each day.  (A bag a day seems like more that I can truthfully commit to.)  Like many if not most Americans, I have definitely fallen into the trap of over consumption of stuff.  I am also going to prayerfully consider what else might be getting in the way of my relationship with God.

I decided to start the 40 bag challenge on Tuesday (the day before Ash Wednesday) because I figured there was no harm in starting right away.  The picture below shows a bit of my first intentional “letting go.”  I started with the little drawers in our sofa table, but that led to going through my stashes of candles and table linens elsewhere in the house.  That led to doing a bit of purging from those other places too.

(I did end up doing something with all those candles, but I will save that for another post.)

Lord, draw me closer to you.

After I wrote this post I was reading my email devotion for today from the Upper Room.  When I took the Strengths Finder test a few years ago, it said that Connectivity was one of my strengths.  I also learned that people who have this strength can sometimes find connections where there are really not any.  That said, this email devotion today seemed to fit right into this post to me.

  Come, Holy Spirit!

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Intention Setting Prayer Journal Meditative Exercise

This year I purchased a planner–Rituals for Living Dreambook and Planner–from a website called The Dragon Tree.  It came across my Facebook feed as a suggested post and I was intrigued.

It is quite extensive, and I have to admit that I have not completed all the pages that require answering questions to better define your goals in life.  The concept behind the planner is to create rituals in your life that you want to make a habit.  It is based on the thought that it is small steps that create change, vs large ideas.

I believe that is what caught my attention when the post about the planner popped up on Facebook, as I had just read an article about studies that showed our brains are much better at creating change when we break the steps down into things we can accomplish more easily.  (I wish I could find the link to that article, but I am not finding it right now.)

Anyhow, on the weekly layout for the planner, there is a mandala design at the top where you put your focus for the week.  This week, the thing that came to me was not a word or words but a heart.  I decided to just go with what my gut was telling me to do and I drew a heart.  Pondering that a bit, I realized that I had colored the red on the outside of the heart and left the inside of the heart blank.  That led me to ask myself “What is in my heart?”.

Instead of being able to write a bunch of things that were on my mind, I realized that I had stumbled on a very significant question to which I really needed to let simmer before I could answer.

After I wrote the question next to my heart at the top of my planner, I took out my prayer journal and markers.  I simple drew a big heart and wrote the question next to it.  As I doodled around and embellished the heart, I considered what was really in my heart.  Many thoughts came to mind, but none were fitting quite right.  Then, something came to me–my need for connection.  I decided that was where I wanted to start.  How I will connect with who/what and how I will do it are the next step.

I decided that the page I had drawn with the heart in the middle was going to be my prayer journal meditative exercise for the month of February.  (I know.  It is fitting with Valentines Day being in the month of February too!)  I am curious to see what will unfold.

If you are looking for a fun and thoughtful exercise to do with a group–adults and even children–you might consider giving each person a piece of paper and asking them to draw a heart in the middle and ponder the question “What is in my Heart?”  Some might answer the question and say, “well, of course, it is Jesus.” But then ask “what does that mean?”  What does it mean to have Jesus in my heart?  It could most definitely be a dig deep exercise.


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My Word for 2017 is “Connect”

For the past few years I have embraced the tradition of choosing a new word symbolize my intentions for the new year.  The tradition was introduced to me by Christine Valters Paintner of Abbey of the Arts.  Christine talks about how we are to let our word choose us as well as us just choosing a word.

As an introvert–someone who needs alone time to recharge–I have been feeling the need to find some balance in my life.  I really do like being with people too.  That was one of my first thoughts when I pondered the word “connect.”  I even tried other words on for size like “weave.”  “Weave” is more poetic, but I was still drawn back to “connect.”  My decision was made.

So, what does this word mean to me and how do I apply it to my life?  The answers to that question are still evolving, but a couple things have stood out to me.  One is the idea of strengthening my connection with God.  Another is helping other strengthen their connection with God.  Instead of doing something completely new, I realized that I was already doing these things through prayer bedes.  (At least, I was intending to do it.)  But intentions are not actions.  One blog post a year is not much action!

That brings me to another thought I had today.  Namely, “How do I connect my mind with my body?”.  Another thing that I have intended to do, which is something I know many intend to do in the new year, is get more exercise.  I have big ideas of what I want to do, but they never seem to be accomplished.  Merging my mind with my body is another way I intend to connect this year.  My word for the year has usually fit easily into my spiritual and mental intentions, but I was excited to see how it could fit into my physical intentions this year too.

Now that I have said that, this website will be an actual track of how I fulfill (or not) my intentions for the coming year.  My goal is to post at least more than I did last year.  That I think I can accomplish.  Two is more than one!

New Year’s Blessings to All!

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Slowing Down and Yielding to the Beautiful


I noticed the daylilies were in bloom this morning.  While googling “daylilies” because it is highlighted as misspelled in this post, I realized that they are edible.  That means that all three of these yellow flowers in my gardens are edible.  Kinda cool.

The Elizabeth Gilbert quote I included in the graphic I just found, and I love it!  It seemed to fit perfectly with my thoughts, as I yielded to absorb the beauty of the blooming yellows I found.

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Prayer is…

weavings4:29:15I found this on my Facebook feed this morning.

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Protestants and the Rosary

I ran across this article this morning on Facebook, and I wanted to share.  It mirrors some of my own beliefs as a raised Lutheran, Episcopal, married Catholic.


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A Rosary Prayer

This is a copy of what I received in my email inbox today from the Upper Room Daily Reflections that I subscribe to.  It features an excerpt from a new book of prayers that can be used with the Anglican Rosary and is written by a friend of mine, Kristen E. Vincent.  What stood out to me today was the phrase “With all that I am, I praise you.”

URMany times (if not always) when I am stringing rosaries, I am also praying.  The act of making rosaries can be as prayerful as using them.  My prayer is often a short phrase that I repeat.  The repetitive form of prayer has become very meaningful to me.

My prayer this morning went something like this:

With all that I am, I praise you, Lord.  In the good times and bad, with all that I am, I praise you, Lord.  What I am, I give to you, Lord.  With all that I am, I praise you, Lord.  Lord, help me to praise you always.  Make my life a prayer to you.  With all that I am, I praise you Lord…

Often additional thoughts well up from the initial phrase of prayer, as you can see above.  Yet, coming back to your initial prayer phrase over and over again, the thoughts end up not distracting you, but taking you deeper into conversation with God.

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Mary, Untier of Knots Chaplet

The idea of Mary working for us to help us untie the knots in our lives stuck a special chord with me.  Some of our difficulties can be like stubborn knots that many times a massage therapist can literally feel in our shoulders and back. It is often the difficulties we have with in relationships with those closest to us that create the largest knots–marriage being high on the list.

The visualization of working with Mary to undo all those stubborn knots is what the Novena to Mary Undoer of Knots is all about.

The greater awareness of the devotion to Mary, Untier of Knots is due to Pope Francis who introduced it to the people of Argentina where he presided as the Archbishop before becoming the Pope of the Catholic Church.

Looking on the internet for information about this devotion, I ran across this adapted prayer on the Word Among Us website that it one of my favorites:

Prayer to Our Lady Undoer of Knots

Holy Mary, full of God’s presence, during your life you accepted the Father’s will with full humility, and the devil was never able to tie you up with his confusion.

Since then, you have interceded for all our difficulties, as you did at the wedding feast of Cana. Full of kindness and patience, you show us how to untie the knots of our lives. By always being our mother, you arrange and clarify the ties that link us to the Lord.

Holy Mary, Mother of God and of us all, you untie the knots of our lives with a mother’s heart. We place our intentions in your hands [mention your prayer request], and we ask you to disentangle every knot and confusion.

Through your grace, intercession, and example, protect us from all evil, and untie the knots that keep us from being united to God. Free from confusion and error, may we find him in all things, keep our hearts in him, and serve him always in our brothers and sisters.

Adapted from a prayer attributed to Fr. Jorge Mario Bergoglio (Pope Francis).  Source:


Mary, Untier of Knots Chaplet by prayerbedes

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