Art as Prayer – Today I Believe

Posted on 07/09/2020 by Christine

Why post today? I am not sure but as I was working on this watercolor, it was saying “just keep going.” Admittedly, I was going to give up in it after I put down the first flower petals. The color did not seem right. The symmetry was way off. But, the purpose was the process. All I was doing was putting paint on paper. It was just a form of therapy for me. Plus, watercolor paper is not cheap so I just kept going.

I started thinking about a daily prayer I started following on Facebook towards the beginning of our stay at home orders. I am not sure how I connected with it exactly, but the page is called The Order of the Trinity and the prayers from the Northumbria Community are used. (Note: words in bold are linked if you click on them.)

During Evening Prayer there are phrases said about what God has given us and things that are not always right. Then, at the end of each paragraph the words “Today I believe” are said. Because I was only following along without having the prayers in front of me, I started responding “Today I believe” because it seemed like a response. (Looking at the prayers in print, it does not designate it as such, but it still feels like a response to me.)

As I was painting today, I found myself using those words as a prayer saying things like “even though I have not idea where this painting is going, today I believe”. Or “even though life right now is kinda weird, and I do not what will happen, today I believe.” etc.. I feel all God is asking is that right here, right now I believe. I do not have to worry about the future or the past, just have faith that God is with me right now. I take a breath and say, “okay. I can do that.”

"Today, I Believe" - Watercolor on paper by Christine Stanton

I think it is Brene Brown that talks about being “perfectly imperfect.” There is much imperfection in this painting just as there is in me, this post, and in life. I am working on embracing it all and just breathing. Despite all the awful things going on in our world right now, God is good. Today, I believe.

Early on in the pandemic I ran across a free online watercolor class with UK artist, Este MacLeod. I thought, I have watercolors I have not used in a long time, why not? And I am so glad I did! It opened me up to painting again, which I had not done in ages. It has also become a bit of a habit, albeit a good one, I think.

In trying to figure out what to do with some of what I was creating, I remembered my ignored little shop on Zazzle called Amen, My Friend that I started many years ago. With my computer scanner I have uploaded images of my work and made them into greeting cards.

Blessings,

Christine

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Practicing Gracious Acceptance – A Mantra, A Prayer, A Breath Prayer

Posted on 03/11/2020 by Christine

The words “gracious acceptance” seem to have been walking in and out the door to my consciousness lately. As they walk by, they say “see me”. I even wrote them down in my planner to acknowledge them, but they seem to want more attention. Today I decided to sit down and spend some time with them.

First, I asked what do those words “gracious acceptance” mean. I have struggled with that word acceptance for a long time. When my therapist told me years ago that I needed to accept panic attacks, I told her she was crazy. There was no way I was going to accept those things. They were not “nice”. Why on earth would I want to accept them? Well, over time I have learned that there is much wisdom in learning to just let them “do their thing” without resisting them, which makes them worse. So, that is some of what I know from experience about the word “acceptance.” But what about “gracious”?

You might say the “I…s” I listed could also be called radical hospitality, but not really. “Gracious acceptance” and “radical hospitality” are both things we can do, but practicing “gracious acceptance” is more about a way of being, granted it affects how we act as well.

I wrote the above in the present tense not because I believe I am all those things or do all those things, but because it is what I want. It could easily be a breath prayer. It could even be used with prayer beads as a repetitive prayer using a line for each group of beads. For instance, replacing or adding to the greeting to Mary–Hail Mary….

On the Anglican Rosary configuration, one line could be repeated for each group of the seven “week beads”. The phrase “I practice gracious acceptance” could be used on the “Cruciform beads”.

As I repeat each line, I cannot help but ponder what makes me resist doing and/or being any of those things, but I know I do. Even recognizing and acknowledging that I do is a step forward. My hope is that I will then be able to understand why I resist and work on letting my resistance go.

It is a practice–a continual practice.

Lord, thank you for loving us anyway as we work our way through this life!

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Lent Art Altar – Altering My Faith

Posted on 02/27/2020 by Christine

As I mentioned in a previous post, I chose Joyce Rupp’s book–Jesus, Friend of My Soul–as my devotional book this Lenten season. But I did not tell you why I chose it. One of my favorite ideas, which has been referred to by multiple writers, is the idea that God is not who I think God is. The idea being that God is much more than just what I think or know, and that it is so out of line for me to assume I that I am never wrong.

My goal in reading these devotions is to let go of my preconceived ideas about Jesus and try to start from scratch. Who are you, Jesus? is the question I want to ask. I want to ask the question from as fresh a mind as I can possibly give. That fresh mind might be childlike. So, not only do I want to get to know Jesus better, but I want to let go of all the stuff that stands in the way of me doing so.

The above was going to be the total of this post before yesterday, which was Ash Wednesday. The reading for the day in the Joyce Rupp book included the photo below.

That little heart with flames is my own addition. Those “flames” just keep coming up for me. I have found that when something makes me a little edgy, it is worth exploring. I mentioned my feelings about flames and fire a bit in a previous post as well. There is something about fire, flames, brashness, abrasiveness, off-putting, intense (words that seem to go together for me) that turns me off. Is it a fear of being criticized? Is it a fear of judgement? Or is it that I do not want to turn others off? Those are some of the questions I want to ask this Lent.

After my devotional time yesterday morning with the book and those thoughts, I ran across another post on Godspace by Christine Sine. She talked about creating a Lenten altar. I so have a corner in our living room that I consider an altar, but I have never thought about making a seasonal altar. When I thought about what I wanted to include in my own Lenten altar. The image below is what came to me. It is what I want my focus to be.

Do you notice the smudge? Yes, that is very purposeful. I brought my little piece of artwork with to church last night. After the service, our priest gave me permission to add the ashes. In a strange way the ashes seem to glow. I have never thought of ashes as glowing before.

I decided my Lenten altar would be on our coffee table. There are still things I might add or take away, but the framed artwork I did and the candle will stay. I think of it as my Altering Altar.

On a side note, that little cardinal was a Christmas gift. He works well for holding down the pages of books I am reading. But today, he took on more meaning for me. I heard my first cardinal singing even with the house all closed up and snow on the ground. I also saw those flaming red wings. Coincidence? Maybe, but it is worth a little wonder. It did alter my mood!

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The Lutheran Rosary and the 40 Days of Lent – Lord, I believe. Help my unbelief.

Posted on 02/24/2020 by Christine

I have a confession to make. A few years ago I started a Lenten practice called 40 Bags in 40 Days. I was very committed to the practice and made sure I has at least a plastic baggie that was either donated, recycles, or put in the garbage every day of the Lenten season. I am not sure whether it was during the first or second year I did it that I realized that the Sundays during Lent were considered “Little Easters” and not included in the 40 days. How did I not know that? Obviously, I never really counted.

Anyway, I felt that was a tidbit of information that might be new to somebody else too, which is why I share it. I am not sure how it relates to using the Lutheran Rosary as a prayer tool, but it does have to do with the symbolism of the beads in the configuration. There are 40 small beads in the Lutheran Rosary and it was originally introduced by the ELCA as a Lenten discipline. The suggested prayers are based on Luther’s Small Catechism.

In the suggested prayers, it suggests saying “I do believe: help me overcome my unbelief!” from Mark 9:24. That has become a favorite repetitive prayer mantra for me no matter which configuration of prayer beads I am using. However, I shorter it a bit to “Lord, I believe. Help my unbelief.”

That may sound like a contradiction, but I have learned that both those sentences can be true to me at the same time.

How do you hold that tension between belief and unbelief?

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Motivation Monday from Wednesday on Thursday

Posted on 02/20/2020 by Christine

This past Tuesday night I was a bit discouraged that the weight I want to loose is just not coming off. I want to do it not necessarily to look better, but to feel better. Over the years, those pounds have crept on little by little and my body has been saying, enough. Tuesday night, however, that motivation did not seem like enough.

Each morning I try to spend some time reading blog posts from those who offer a spiritual message. Wednesday morning I read a blog post from GODSPACE titled “The Heartbeat of God & Rhythm of Eternal Breath: Fire Power”. My first reaction was to pull back a bit from that word “power.” When I think of God and breath, I think of a gentle whisper vs a roaring fire. The power of a roaring fire seems too loud, a but intimidating, and even scary. Yet, throughout the day on Wednesday, I kept coming back to that post. The idea of breath and oxygen igniting the Holy Spirit within me actually gave me a bit of motivation.

What if I looked at my time each day on the treadmill as time to get that fire of the Holy Spirit burning within me. The faster I went, the more oxygen I would take in. The more oxygen I took in, the more I would fan those flames within me. Strange as it seems, I found a new motivation to get on the treadmill and move that rate of speed up a bit. (Granted only from 2.7 to 2.8). I also stayed on the treadmill longer, so I went a greater distance. Those pants in my breath had new meaning.

We are all motivated by many different things. I would have never thought this might be the motivation I needed. I am sure the author of the blog article did not necessarily have that intent either, but I am thankful. I truly believe the Holy Spirit works in mysterious ways.

I am due soon for a new pair of running shoes. I am thinking they need to be red or orange.

What motivates you?

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Viewing God’s Creation under a Microscope – The Seed of Life – Flower of Life – Fruits of Life

Posted on 02/18/2020 by Christine
Artist known as Lakey the Poet on Instagram and Lakey on Facebook

(Photo above by by artist known as lakeythepoet on Instagram and Lakey on Facebook)

With my last post I mentioned a bit about my new fascination with impermanent art. The first thing I thought of when I pondered the concept was Bert’s sidewalk paintings in Mary Poppins. Another new thing for me is Instagram. After saying “no” many times, I finally decided to give it a try because so many of my family members have switched from Facebook to Instagram.

I am still figuring out how it all works, but one thing that seems to be more prominent is the hashtag for searches. Hashtags are something I have not really pursued, but I can see their purpose more clearly now. Case in point was searching for sidewalk chalk art. Above is a photo from an artist I found on Instagram. The design is one he uses on many of his drawings. I found out the pattern is symbolic of the Seed of Life or Flower of Life also known as Fruit of Life. It is found all over the place if you look for it.

These are only a few that I found:

Floor stencil from IriaArii on Etsy, Notebook Journal by ilexdesigns on Red Rubble, Stained Glass from Delphi Glass, Earrings by Trinketyard on Etsy, Quote by Briana Borten at brianaborten.com

Please click on bold type above for links.

When researching a bit about the symbol, I found it fascinating that the 7 circle form (not repeated) symbolizes the seven days of creation found in the bible. In all cultures and faith traditions, the symbol is a representation–though ancient, before the microscope was even invented–of cellular division.

Needless to say, I will notice and think of this geometric pattern differently

How have you thought of something differently when you knew more about it?

Lakey is a real person. More about him here. This is how I found him on Facebook.

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Pondering Impermanence – The Joy of Human Earth Art Creations

Posted on 02/16/2020 by Christine

A friend from our Hold Disorder of Dancing Monks Facebook group has been posting photos of art she has made in the woods. They are fascinating–made with leaves, berries, seeds, nuts, sticks, and whatever else she finds on her walks. I commented to her how wonderful it would be to happen upon one of her creations on a path in the woods. For me, the feeling could be equated with a flash mob. (If you search “flash mob” on YouTube you will find out what I am talking about if you do not know already.)

Pondering more why I consider my friend’s “earth art” (I will call it for lack of a better term) is so fascinating is in a major part because of the time and care taken to create something of impermanent. Truly, what a gift it would be to stumble upon one!

In the spirit of that same impermanence and using pieces from nature, I decided to try to create something myself with the petals of the tulips I purchased earlier in the week that were now falling apart. Granted, it just does not have the same meaning as something you would find on a walking path. Even doing this indoors without any wind, it was hard to keep the petals in place. It made me appreciate even more the patience someone would have to have to created something outdoors.

There is a book called Morning Altars: A 7-Step Practice to Nourish Your Spirit Through Nature Art and Ritual by Day Schildkret that is on my wish list.

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Walk and Wonder Lenten Journey

Posted on 02/11/2020 by Christine

Yesterday, I ran across this new book of devotions for Lent on Facebook through the Ave Maria Press page. Joyce Rupp is one of my favorite authors and I have not read one of her books in awhile so I decided to look it up.

Though I really try to shop small businesses vs large ones like Amazon, there are sometimes little things Amazon offers that makes it easier and sometimes even advantageous to shop through them. For one, they offer free Kindle samples, so you can read a bit of the book before you buy it. That is what I did with this new book, Jesus Friend of My Soul by Joyce Rupp.

In the Kindle sample of Jesus, Friend of My Soul, Rupp refers to a book by John O’Donohue titled Walking in Wonder.

That got me all excited because I am a big fan of John O’Donohue’s writings and my word for this year is “wonder.” (Search my other posts tagged YearlyWord if you do not know about that practice.)

So, I looked the book up on Amazon only to find I had already purchased the book in November of 2018. (Another perk Amazon gives you so you do not order a book you already purchased from them.) The cover did not even look that familiar to me. I checked my book shelf and sure enough, there it was. It could not have walked down their by itself, so I must of put it there, though I do not usually put books on the bookshelf until I have already read them.

This morning when I looked at the coffee table in front of me, the focus word I put on my planner for this week caught my eye. My thought when I wrote down the word “walk” was that I wanted to get on the treadmill and walk daily, and maybe even outside if the weather allowed.

The prompt for this week in the Facebook Living Your Word of the Year 2020 group, the prompt for our journals this week was to journal one of the top was you wanted to grow by having a word for the year. In my journal I wrote “yield to wonder.”

Hmm…? I think I will just have to walk and see what this all might teach me. Stop, Look, and Listen? Do you ever notice little connections like this? Do you ever wonder if it is God saying something to you somehow? Maybe it is simply little taps on our shoulder that God makes to show us God is with us. How can that not make you smile. 🙂

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The Meaning of Symbols?

Posted on 02/10/2020 by Christine

Before I started this post, I researched the cross I used on this set of prayer beads. It is called a “quatrefoil.” Because I am not an expert on this symbol or even crosses in general, I am going to leave the research for those of you who want to look it up. However, a few things about the cross do stand out. I will list a few of them:

  • The name “quatrefoil” is taken from Latin words meaning four leaves.
  • It is often considered a symbol of good luck–think of a four leaf clover.
  • In the Native American tradition is can represent the directions north, south, east, and, west.
  • It is a symbol often seen in Gothic churches.
  • It is said to represent the four apostles.
  • It is a symbol used to represent the cross in many Christian antiquities of the Byzantine Era.
  • I just saw the symbol used in the architecture of the Japanese garden at the Huntington in Pasadena California on a recent visit. (see photo below)

Symbols can also take on meanings we attach to them personally. For me, the quatrefoil cross will remind me of a perfect spring day enjoying God’s creation after visiting Huntington Gardens.

You can find the rosary pictured above on my Etsy site:

Protestant Rosary in Bronze and Lime Green with Resurrection Bead

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The Eternal Light Within – Welcome, Holy Spirit

Posted on 01/27/2020 by Christine

The morning I was greeted by this inspiring prayer written by Christine Sine on her Godspace blog. I decided I wanted to use it as my morning prayer this week. Because the prayer included the word “wonder” (my yearly word for 2020), I decided to write it out in my word/art/prayer journal. (The word journal is a practice I am doing this year with Valerie Sjoden in a Facebook group.)

As I was writing it out and coloring it in, the word “eternal” stuck out to me. In doing some reading these past few days about Saint Brigid of Kildare and considering what I might want to share here on my website, the symbolism of Brigid’s eternal flame came to me. It is said that Saint Brigid and 19 of her nuns tended an eternal flame, which represented the light of Christianity.

There are remains of the place where that fire was said to have been kept is outside in the churchyard of St. Brigid’s Cathedral in the town of Kildare, Ireland. (I wish I had taken a better photo when we were there.) Only a few years ago the town of Kildare and a Convent in the area renewed the practice and keep a flame burning. (They tried to keep it burning in the center of town but had trouble keeping the monument lit.)

After I drew the flame image with my words in my journal, I considered how the Hold Spirit is often associated with a flame(s). Could that eternal in me is the Holy Spirit in me?

Next on my list for the day was to try to incorporate some yoga into my daily routine. As I mentioned in my last post, I am really feeling the need for some grounding. I took off my slippers, put my hands at heart center, and moved my foot up the side of my leg and my monkey mind chattered away…a little wobbly…no judgment…focus…my hands look kind of like a flame. When I raise my hands above my hear, my arms kinda make a bigger flame…wobble, wobble…focus…okay…hey, that word “welcome” is meaningful in that prayer too. Lord, help me to welcome all.

Amen. Thank you, Lord. I believe.

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